Week 9 is officially behind me and let me just say this was a tough week. As I type that, I feel like that is a pretty consistent theme- “It’s tough.” This week, I really struggled to get the miles in and was not really feeling at the top of my game. I am very proud that while I struggled, I survived and quite honestly I believe I will be stronger because of it. Of course, the motivation of running for such a special and strong boy named Josh keeps me focused on our greater sense of purpose. As I close out week 9, I have now logged 247 miles since December 12th and 38 of those miles was this week. Wow! No kidding it was tough. It is really a good thing that training is broken down into daily and weekly miles. It was just two short months ago that I sat here typing my first post. Had I thought too much about the actually enormity of what was in front of me, I think I would have been more overwhelmed. My “take away”-life is much easier when we break it into manageable steps.
Fundraising Update
As I type, we have raised $9810 with $9660 posted to my fundraising page. I have sent in two checks that have not posted yet. This is $350 dollars more than when I posted last week. So we are continuing to make great strides. I know I have said this before, but I am so incredibly grateful for all the support that I have received from friends, family and coworkers. You really help keep me going. After all, it is raising funds for cancer research that is the real purpose behind the madness of the miles. I will just share briefly and example of how much this helps. This morning I woke up early because I was going to be running 16 miles. When I woke, there was an email waiting for me. It read, “Congratulations you received a donation from…….” Here was my reminder of my greater sense of purpose. It moved me within moments from feeling like “I just want to get this damn run done” to “I am so excited to be running today because I am doing so much more than running.” So thank you to everyone who has already so generously contributed! I also want to encourage anyone that has not had a chance to contribute to think about doing so within the next two months. I really believe that we can reach $13.1K and to do so, we really need to stretch the boundaries of what we think we can do. All donations, both big and small help bring us closer.
Sometimes We Need to Make Adjustments
Running teaches me so much. I had high hopes of blogging more often in hopes of sharing my journey and experiences, but what time has demonstrated is that I can do this once a week. So I have tried to make my posts focus on an overall theme that emerged for me during the week. Week 9 has taught me that sometimes we need to make adjustments to our plans and more specifically to our training. However, adjustments do not mean shortcuts. I am someone that often thinks in both metaphor and in short stories so I will anchor this theme with a short story that a colleague shared with me during a meeting. This colleague was actually sharing a story that had been shared with her by a colleague who was retelling a story told by her pastor. Are you still with me? It is not important to know the origin of the story, other than it is one that has been retold because the meaning proved significant for a number of us this week. So, I too will retell it briefly.
The pastor explained to his congregation that he recently got a new car. This car was a standard, not an automatic. Now this pastor did not know how to drive a standard. I immediately connected with this story because my first “new car” was also a standard and I too did not know how to drive it when I first picked it up. He described the difficulty with trying to get the car to drive and as he told the story, he moved back and forth to motion the kind of bucking back and forth that takes place when you are not in gear. As my colleague was retelling the story, I had memories of being close to tears when I experienced this with my car because I felt as if I could not go anywhere. However, as the pastor continued on with the story, he explained that when he finally shifted it and it went into gear, things got smoother. This was like a magical “Ah ha” moment. The pastor’s telling of this story made the connection to life and how sometimes we feel we are not getting anywhere what we need to do is shift. Shift our place, perspective or perhaps our attitude.
This story stuck with me because this week I had to do quite a bit of adjusting with my running and most often I felt like I was not getting anywhere because I was so run down and quite simply, exhausted. Making adjustments is hard and I know that the image of bouncing back and forth in a standard really helped. Sometimes adjustments, even as slight as shifting a gear can make all the difference. So this week I decided to take Friday off from work as a rest day. I had not had a day off in a long time and my body was telling me that I needed it. Of course after making the decision to take Friday off to catch up on some rest, Mother Nature had different plans.
Our team run was scheduled for Saturday and all the weather reports were suggesting that we were going to have a snow storm. While I certainly appreciate the character building experience of running in challenging conditions, I was so run down that I did not think this would be helpful and perhaps could even move me from exhaustion to being sick. I did not want to chance it. So I made the decision to use my rest day on Friday as an opportunity to get in my long run. After all it was a beautiful day in the 40’s. I figured that this “little adjustment” would just mean that I would rest on Saturday.
I went out for a 16 mile run on Friday and even though it was a beautiful day; my body was not accepting this change of plans. I was incredibly tired as I ran and it was not a tired that I could push through, although, I did try. It was almost comical to look at my Garmin report after the run. Some miles were at an 8:20 min pace and others were at a 9:40 pace. It was almost as if I ran faster at times as a way to fight the fatigue yet I never felt like I was going fast. It more felt like the image of driving a standard without knowing how to shift. I felt like I was not going anywhere. Sometimes we need to listen to our bodies and this was one of those times. I ended up cutting the run short and only logged 11.5 miles. This was really the wise thing to do because I really wasn’t sure if I had enough energy to walk the remaining 4.5 miles never mind running them. I was disappointed but once again I had to readjust my readjustment.
Saturday arrived and would you guess that when I woke, there was no snow. Go figure. I could have rested Friday and run with the team on Saturday. However, having logged 11.5 miles on Friday and not having actually rested, I did not attend the team run. This was a huge lesson for me in learning to adjust. Even when we have everything all mapped out, sometimes life has other plans for us. I rested on Saturday. I visited my beautiful Nephew which was a treat, but other than that I am not sure I accomplished anything. It was just the rest that I needed. However looming was the realization that I still had not logged a16 mile run.
There are no Shortcuts
There are some weeks when less is more. This was not one of them. Next weekend I have a 20 mile run and quite honestly, I believe the long run is the most important one of the week. It is the run that not only tests our physical endurance, but more importantly our mental toughness. I was not sick and after a good night sleep on Saturday by Sunday morning I was feeling more rested. However, the price that I would have to pay for resting on Saturday would be running in single digit temperatures with strong winds and alone, or taking it inside on the treadmill otherwise know as the “dreadmill.” Neither is overly inviting. Some may think the treadmill is the easier of the two, while others would run in any conditions rather than be on a treadmill for that long. I just think it is a different type of challenge. I choose to take it indoors because while it would certainly test my mental toughness running that long on a treadmill, I really did not think the cold air would be all that great for my asthma.
So today, I woke at 6am so I could properly hydrate. I arrived at the gym about 7:15am and was running by 7:30am. I was determined to log my 16 mile run. You do get a lot of funny looks when you run that long inside. In fact, I think there were 4 or 5 people that worked out on the machine next to me. I had to help myself get over the fact that I was making another adjustment by running inside. I kept thinking “maybe I should just go outside.” However, something told me to stick with my plan and run inside. I am so glad that I did.
The treadmill gave me an opportunity to really focus on keeping steady pace. It was getting it into the “right gear” which I hadn’t been able to do all week. Today I met with success-as boring as it was. The result was not feeling exhausted and I actually felt like I was holding myself back. Patience and persistence were my friends today. I was only running about 10 seconds slower than I typically do, but this small adjustment made the world of difference. I also experimented with GU-gel which I now love and will be using on all long runs. Being on the treadmill also gave me the opportunity to really focus on so much that I don’t pay attention to when I am outside such as pace and stride. So I am glad with the choice I made and even more relieved that I have logged the miles.
The treadmill was an adjustment not a short cut. This week I had to make a number of adjustments, however I logged all my miles with a few extra. It may not have been as I planned but I have learned that sometimes making an adjustment or several can make all the difference in the world. I also learned that sometimes these adjustments get us to the proverbial finish line smarter and stronger but there are really no shortcuts.
In that same sense, there are no short cuts to dreaming a world without cancer. We cannot get there without research and research requires funding. Recognizing this is what keeps my steps in stride and serves as the constant reminder of the importance of what we are doing by raising funds to support Dana Farber’s ultimate goal-a world without cancer. There are no short cuts. It requires our collective efforts and support. Thank you for being on this journey with me. We are dreaming a world without cancer and step by step, mile by mile and dollar by dollar someday we will get there.
With Gratitude,
Kerry D
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